Update on Ed

[collwen]

They're now talking about sending Ed home, or since Mom can't take care of him at home, to a nursing home. The trick with that would be to find one in the area with an open room that will take someone as young as him (since he's 38).

I've been asking Mom to get a diagnosis and prognosis in writing for days now. It's hard for her to keep track of things in the best of circumstances and I feel like I don't know what's going on. And since I don't have power of attorney or medical proxy, it has to come from her. She did say that she's gotten the paperwork to get power of attorney over him for herself and to get him onto extended disability.

She sits there every day and only sees a doctor every couple of days, and she gets confused every time she talks to them (hence why I want something in writing, damn it).

No way in heaven, hell, or anywhere you can think of that I am letting her take him home- she can't handle taking care of him and she knows it, and if she even thinks of it I will sit on her or something and remind her why she brought him back to the hospital in the first place.

Comments

[purpura.livejournal.com]

See if you can get your mom to bring in a written list of questions. that way she can write down the answers and hopefully not forget important things. I know this still leaves margins for error, but it may help.

[auntiero.livejournal.com]

The problem with getting things in writing is HIPPA. It's a really pain in the butt law that is SUPPOSED to protect patient privacy, but is so restrictive that medical professionals' hands are tied with what they can tell someone other than the patient, their legal guardian or who is empowered to make medical decisions for someone else.

But definitely give her a written list of questions to CALL THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE WITH (tell her not to wait to see the doc in the hospital - she has to be pushy) and get the answers when she truly has Power of Attorney for Ed. Good luck.

[bailey21975.livejournal.com]

Not to be repetitive, but yes, your mom needs to take a written list. And yes, she needs to be assertive, even pushy, until she gets the answers she needs to make informed decisions for your brother's care.

This is, in part, the kind of situation why my partners and I are each giving the other 2 medical power of attorney for each other. None of us should ever have to fight to get the information we need to make decisions for loved ones!

I wish there was something I could do to ease your stress a little! Worrying about a family member has got to be one of the most draining things in the world to do, especially when you feel so damn helpless.

[irishwitchyone.livejournal.com]

Ed and Chad discussed getting you that power of attorney, and Ed is very receptive of that idea. Ma doesn't need it as next of kin...not to mention that you are the most capable of handling this situation. Or...it things are going to be this hard, Chad says that he will take power of attorney as one of his oldest friends, if Ed is willing. Chad also suggests that you call the hospital and see if they can suggest a short-term care facility for him, unless they actually think that he will need to be in a home permanently. When you come up this weekend, mayhap you can get to a doctor then. In any case, if you need us, you know how to reach us.